


Archives of a Rainbow Sheep

by Marinatedchildren



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Flustered Sirius, Fralice, Hogwarts, Humour, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, LGBTQ, M/M, Marauders, Marauders era, Pining, Sirius PoV, jily, professor minnie, slowburn, tw, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-25
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-18 00:34:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,397
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29359599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marinatedchildren/pseuds/Marinatedchildren
Summary: A story following the Marauders school days from Sirius' POV, a bit of realisation, a smidge of character development and a whole lot of wolfstar.This is going to include a lot of actual issues teenagers went through, so be prepared for James' cowboy phase and Sirius' acne meltdown.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 7





	1. Most Ancient and Noble House of Black

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Childhood :)
> 
> TW for some mentions of abuse

Inside of Grimmauld Place, you were expected to live by four things, and four things only. To be ambitious, to be cunning, to be a leader, and to be resourceful. Centuries of pureblooded families all abiding by the same four rules, all drilling the same derogatory beliefs into their children's heads, inbreading creating lines and lines of clones.

Two of these being Orion and Walburga Black, second cousins, betrothed to each other and married in the 1950's. Walburga fell pregnant in the early months of 1959, giving birth to her first son in November, Sirius Orion Black III.

It is fair to say that Sirius' birth was a big deal, not only being expected to continue the longest pureblood line in centuries, but he was now the official heir to the entire Black family fortune. _A lot_ of money. So, from an early age, Sirius only knew rule after rule. _Sit straighter, Pronounce your T's, no crying._ Tutor after tutor. _Proper Wizarding etiquette, Languages of the Wizarding world, The impure: Why they're lesser._ Punishment after punishment. _Relacio, Pugnus..._

It was no life for a child, but after growing up around something, with little access to the outside world, your brain is programmed to accept it as normal, and as far as Sirius was concerned, it was, because everyone's parents used dark magic on them, right?

A year after Sirius' birth, Walburga had another child, Regulus. Regulus Black was a backup if anything, created purely for emergency purposes if Sirius was to ever fail, another carrier of the Black blood. Though, this position did do him some favour, Orion and Walburga were much less strict with Regulus, _he_ was allowed to go and sulk, _he_ was allowed to put his knife on the wrong side of the plate, _he_ was allowed to lie around if he felt ill. Maybe that is when Sirius started to wonder if everything was really so normal. 

_six years old_

Sirius was lying on his stomach in his room, paper and quill in front of him. Earlier that day, he had pushed his dresser so he could reach the window, and looked out at the muggle park that lay opposite his house for hours, mother and father were out on business _._ Anyway, during that time, Sirius had spotted a pair of muggle teenagers. First reaction: disgust, his top lip curling how his fathers did. That was how he was _supposed_ to react. But, after a few moments of glaring, his brow softened, his eyes turned curious, the boy had pulled out a large rectangular box from his bag and a circular disk. After a few moments of fumbling, the girl he was with started to laugh _,_ Sirius only ever saw Regulus laugh.

_"Alooone at the edge of a universe"_

The box started to sing, Sirius opened his window, leaning his ear out of it as the teenagers started to dance with each other. 

_"humming a tune_

_for merely dreaming we were snoooow_

_hmm hmm hmmm_

_a siren sounds_

_like the goddess who promises endless apologies_

_of paradise_

_and only she can make it right_

_hmmm hmm hmmm_

_so things are different tonight"_

It was strange, Sirius' initial thought was wondering how they fitted a person into such a small space, _mu_ _st be a shrinking spell,_ but then he started listening, letting himself be consumed by the music, the sounds were so-

so _special._ They made him feel warm, like time had stopped and it was just him floating around, like he could un-straighten his back and smile, so he just closed his eyes, swaying intently with the words. 

The song must have ended at some point (as much as Sirius had protested from behind the house's sound barrier) and he was now on his bed, drawing out the mysterious sound box, _Perhaps mother would like one, then I could listen from outside._

He had just finished drawing a little heart for good measure, when the front door closed and his fathers booming voice beckoned for Kreacher. Kreacher, the house elf, had started working just last week, the previous one too old to work up to standards, beheaded and stuffed. 

"Kreacher!" He had called.

"Yes, Master Orion" The servant replied, no more than a second later. 

"Hang our coats!" 

"Of course Master, Kreacher is taking Mistress's and Master Orion's coa-"

"Oh, hurry up!"

Sirius tuned out the rest of the conversation, no doubt of Kreacher being 'told off', and ran across the upstairs hallway, being sure to straighten up before descending the stairs. Mother was sitting down on the sofa, daily prophet open, Father stood looking out the window. 

"Mother?" He called, his voice small and quiet, tucking a strand of stray hair behind his ear promptly. 

"What is it Sirius?" She said back, not looking up from the paper.

"I- I uh drew something for you!" He smiled, trying to get her to look up. 

She didn't reply, but her eyes stopped trailing around the page, either stuck on a word or thinking about something. After a few painful seconds, she turned her head to look at her husband, and then back to Sirius. Sirius took this as an opportunity, and slid the parchment over her Paper, not looking up from the ground.

She looked at the sketch, her eyes un-focusing for a second.

She then got up and pulled Sirius out of the room, holding firmly onto his arm. She walked him into the kitchen, closing the door. 

"Sirius what is this!?" She demanded, holding the paper up to his face.

"A-a picture, I- they make funny noise and-"

"-they are _muggle_ , mudbloods made these Sirius, I forbid you from looking at them!" 

"But Mother-"

"Do _not_ talk back to me!" She pulled out her wand, "Pugnus!" 

His nose broke, _again._ Holding the front of his face, Sirius sighed, muttering a weak sorry, disappointed tears welling in his eyes.

Waiting a few moments, Walburga turned her attention back at the paper, scowling. She looked it up and down, stopping briefly on the heart in the corner, then held it up in the air. 

"Incendio" She whispered, pointing her wand right at corner, "Wipe those tears, don't be weak" 

_Nine years old_

"Awh, c'mon Sirius lets go play!" Regulus whined from outside his brothers room. 

After a large scuffling sound, Sirius opened the door grinning, holding up his blanket. 

"Fort!" Regulus cheered, punching the air in boyish glee.

"Fort!" Sirius replied, smirking mischievously. 

Regulus ran into his room, emerging later with a bundle of his own blankets and plonked them down on Sirius' bed. They were all green in colour, just like everything else in the house, _Slytherin pride_ and all. Sirius got his desk chair and lined it up next to his bed frame, watching out for his brothers little feet.

"D'ya want to throw the blanket over Reggie?" 

"Yessss!" He smiled, all of his teeth showing, and that's what he did. He threw the quilt over the top of the chairs, doing a messy job of it, but still acceptable. The boys then crawled under, putting pillows on the floor, making a little den.

"Tell me a story!" Regulus said, referencing to one of Sirius' wild action tales.

"Alright, well" He cleared his throat, "Once, a long long time ago, there was a man named uhhh....Named Shorgan!"

That made Regulus laugh, Sirius had always had the wildest imagination, especially when it came to naming things. 

"Shorgan had one of the most powerful wands in the _universe_ and he used it to defeat all the spider people! they had eight legs and sharp teeth and would steal little brothers in the middle of the night-"

His little brother gasped, which made Sirius smirk. 

"Regulus, Sirius!" Orion called up the stairs, "Come here at once!"

Looking at the frown on Regulus' face, Sirius said, "Come back later tonight Reg, we can finish it then!"

His brothers smile returned, "Okay!" 

"Coming father!" Sirius shouted out his room, emerging from the blankets. 

The two boys left the room and walked out to the living area, standing in the door frame expectantly. Walburga was muttering something at the family tapestry, "Filthy blood traitors, waste of magical blood!"

"The Potters are blood-traitors, neither of you two are ever to confide in a Potter, do you understand!?" Orion stated from the other side of the room.

"What did they do?" Sirius said at the same time Regulus said, "Yes father"

Walburga sneered, "They refused to offer their worthless son for betrothal! How do they expect him to find an adequate pureblooded wife!?"

"He does not deserve the status, Walburga, already showing signs of unreliability.." 

That was true, it had been going around all the purebloods (sacred 28) that the Potters son was definitely a troublemaker, whether it be causing disruptions in diagon alley or his generally untidy appearance, there was always something to report. Sirius actually thought the boy seemed quite fun, but he would hug a living Salazar Slytherin before telling his parents _that_.

"Do you understand why you must _never_ speak with a Potter, Sirius!?"

"Yes father"

_Ten years old_

"One, two, step! One, two ,step!" The senile instructor yelled over the ballroom music, it was a Sunday which meant _dancing lessons._ Salazar forbid the heir of the Black family couldn't ballroom dance, how would he _survive_. 

He was paired with Selena Parkinson, her sour face much to close to his for Sirius' liking. They spun in circles, unfaltering footwork, especially with their parents watching. 

"Pick that chin up, Sirius!" The man shouted, receiving a poorly hidden eye roll back.

"You ought to behave!" Selena gasped, eyes flicking around nervously. 

_Yeah and you ought to get your breath out my face,_ "Mhm" He responded. 

_Eleven years old_

It was Sirius' eleventh birthday, normally birthdays weren't celebrated in the _ancient and most noble house of Black_ but today was different, he was expecting a letter.

A Hogwarts letter.

So, at 6am, Sirius did the usual, dress in his traditional black robes, brush out his hair (which was growing surprisingly fast) and put on a pair of shined black loafers.

Walking down the stairs, he could hear his parents talking in the kitchen.

"He _is_ going to be sorted into Slytherin, Walburga, stop worrying! We didn't raise him to be anything but!"

Feeling slightly put out, Sirius cleared his throat, attracting the attention of them both.

"Sirius" Orion grunted, nodding at his son. 

"Sit" Walburga waved at a seat, placed before a piece of parchment. Sirius obliged and went to sit down, hands shaking as he reached or the letter.

_Dear Mr Black,_

_We are pleased to inform you that you have a place at_

_Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry._

_Enclosed you will find a list of resources_

_you are required for the start of term, any issues please contact me._

_Sincerely,_

_Professor M McGonagall_

"I hear this new headmaster is letting in mudbloods," Walburga scoffed, speaking up to be heard from her end of the boundless table, "I'm sure it will slow the curriculum, dirty savages with no sense of proper magic!" 

"There is no impure blood in Slytherin!" Orion added, revisiting their earlier disagreement, but Walburga just glanced sideways at Sirius, brief yet noticeable. 

_What's that supposed to mean!?_ Sirius thought to himself, he hadn't done anything! 

"Of course." She added. "Never in Slytherin.." 

Sirius just rolled his eyes at this, always _Slytherin this, Slytherin that,_ Hah! Imagine if he got himself sorted into Hufflepuff or something. 

"We will take you to collect your things next weekend, we have a banquet with the Malfoys this Saturday, their son Lucius will be returning for his sixth year with you." Orion said. 

"Do I have to sit with him!" Sirius sighed, Lucius Malfoy was as interesting as a sleeping flobberworm, him and Sirius' cousin Narcissa had just been betrothed, no doubt what this banquet was about.

"No, you will sit where you please in the Slytherin carriage" Walburga said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Yes mother" Sirius groaned, biting a slice of toast. 


	2. Brotherhood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Introducing the gang!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's remember that Sirius lived in a very sheltered household and was raised around words he was taught to accept as normal :)

"Come _on,_ Sirius!" Walburga sighed, waiting in the living room of Grimmauld Place. 

The two of them were to apparate to Diagon Alley today, off to buy the best of the best of _best_ , and only that for a Black. Sirius couldn't stop smiling, he hardly ever got to leave the house, and when he did, it was only to other pureblood's houses for silly banquets they simply went to brag at. Ever since the great record player fiasco of '64, his parent had been very careful to keep him out of muggle sight. 

"Yes, Mother" He jumped the last step, ignoring her dissatisfied grunt. 

He was sucked into a compressed tunnel, only for a second, but long enough to bring on some mild nausea, "Bloody hell" 

"Watch your mouth" 

"Sorry, Mother"

"YOU GET BACK HERE BOY!" A shopkeeper yelled, waving a cloth towards a running boy. 

He had the messiest hair Sirius had ever seen, with round glasses and a face-splitting grin. There was a nasty smell coming from the shop now--Zonkos--and a brown mist seeping out the windows.

"Disgusting blood-traitor boy" Walburga seethed, pulling Sirius off in the opposite direction, "Did you bring the list" 

Sirius was trying to look over his Mothers arm, maybe he could get another look at what the boy had done, never had he seen a smile like that before, "Mhm" He replied, distractedly. 

"Sirius!?" She stopped, looking at his with disdain, "That's the Potter boy! You remember what we said about him!?" 

"Yes, Mother" He groaned, rolling his eyes once his back turned, trust Mother to hate anything fun. 

"The list!" 

"Sorry, Mother" He held out the parchment, reflex response to apologise, that was always the best way to go about things. 

"Come" She led him off down an alley way to the side, it was significantly darker than Diagon ally, less happy children and more scowling elders. 

After a depressing hour of searching, they had gotten most of Sirius' school supplies, all except a wand. Despite Walburga's aversion, they did have to go back into Diagon Ally for this, Olivanders is, in fact, the best wand maker around. 

"Pine wood with a dragon heartstring core, a very impressive wand, Mister Black" The older man smiled down on him, handing over the payed for wand. 

Walburga steered him out of the store before he could thank Mr Ollivander, disapparating them the second they set foot on concrete. 

"Go to your room and pack your trunk" She commanded him, leaving his side to complain to her husband. 

Sirius didn't bother responding, just ran up the stairs, he couldn;t wait to show Regulus what he got. 

"Reggie, Reggie!" He pounded on his brothers door. It opened a second later, Regulus smiling and hopping up and down excitedly. 

"Did you get it all!" 

"Yeah come look" He walked into his younger brothers room, dumping the bags contents onto the floor. 

"Woah" Regulus breathed, looking at the telescope, fiddling with its settings.

"Cool right!?" 

"It's awesome! I can't _wait_ to go to Hogwarts!" 

"Next year Reg, think of everything we can do without Mother and Father there" Sirius whispered, mischievous grin on his face. 

Regulus slapped a hand over his face, looking towards his bedroom door, then back to Sirius trying not to laugh. 

"It'll be great" 

**_____**

"Can I go now!?" Sirius pleaded, jumping on the spot, his ticket to freedom only a few metres away. 

Walburga dug her nail into the skin on his ear, "Don't be disrespectful!"

"Sorry, Mother" He grumbled, pawing at his ear. 

"You're getting your hair cut at Christmas" Orion said, eyeing Sirius' fast growing hair, "I didn't raise a daughter" 

"Yes, Father" 

"Remember to stand straight" 

"Yes, Mother" 

"Chin high" 

"Yes, Father" 

"No talking to Mudbloods" 

"Yes, Mother" 

"You may leave" 

"Yes, Father" Sirius replied, a lot less monotone, excitement welling up in the pit of his stomach, he'd felt nothing like it before. 

He took off towards the train, jumping into the first opening he saw, trunk already stored away by Kreacher in the luggage compartment. He was immediately met with the smell of Sugar and Pumpkins, ears buzzing at the laughs of reuniting friends, and cries of what he assumed were seventh years. Everyone looked so happy, it was hard to _not_ smile in such company.

He walked down the narrow hall, a slight skip in his step, peering into--mostly full--carriages on his way. It wasn't until he got nearer the end of the train things started to clear up. 

"Sirius" Someone said from behind him, her familiar, piercing voice making him groan inwardly. 

"What, Trixie" He turned, using the nickname she hated the most. 

"Do _not_ call me, Trixie!" She shrieked, pushing some curly hair behind her shoulder, "Your Mother requested we sit together"

"Yeah well I don't see her" 

"Lets be reasonable, Sirius" Her sister walked up behind him, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

"Cissa" He nodded, "I was just _leaving"_

 _"N-"_ Bellatrix started, silenced by Narcissa's hand.

"Lucius is sitting with us, Bella" 

Bellatrix grumbled something explicit under her breath, stomping and turning away, slipping into an empty room. 

"Thanks, Cissy!" Sirius ran in the other direction, shouting over his shoulder. He knew she hadn't done it for his benefit, but what's the harm in irritating her a bit.

And so he was back to browsing, slightly put off by the lack of room, he would rather not sit with a bunch of fifth years. That was until he saw one...

"You're that kid from Diagon Ally right!?" Sirius asked, opening the door to a nearly empty carriage, where three people looked at him in surprise. 

"I have been there, yes" He laughed, putting back on the glasses he was cleaning. 

"No, I mean you set off that thing in Zonkos" 

"Oh! Yeah that was me, I'm James Potter" He grinned, puffing his chest out. 

"Nice" Sirius sat down, "I'm Sirius Black" 

Everyone's eyes widened, except for one boys, he was still looking out of the window, absently rubbing his arm with a scarred hand. 

"Black?" The smallest one asked, "Like _Noble and Most Ancient_ blood supremacists?"

"Peter!" James gasped. 

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Yes, Inbred blood puppet at your service" 

James snorted at that, despite trying to play it off with a cough, which made Sirius grin even more. 

"You can laugh, I was joking" 

"So your _not_ one of those blood supremacists?" The boy--Peter--asked wearily. 

"Nope" Sirius responded, popping the P, "I haven't any problems with mudbloods" 

"What did you just say" James snapped his head towards him, eyes wide. 

Sirius faltered, what had he said wrong, "I- what I didn't.." 

"Wait...you do know what that _means_ right?" 

"To be muggleborn..." Sirius replied, looking sceptically at James, "That's what Mother said anyway?" 

James seemed to relax a bit after that, "No, it's a really really nasty word for them, just say muggleborn, alright?" 

Sirius could feel the redness on his cheeks, he hadn't meant to say anything _nasty_ about them, "I'm sorry, I had no idea, that's what my parents always said and-"

"-It's alright, you didn't know" James smiled, somewhat reassuringly. Sirius decided he quite liked James Potter. 

"Er.." Peter looked around, it had gone quite silent in the carriage, "That's Remus by the way" 

Remus looked over from the window as the train started to move, giving a small smile and a wave.

Sirius didn't know what to do with that, so just waved back rather awkwardly. 

"So, what house do want to-" Peter started, cut off by James' outburst. 

"GRYFFINDOR, WHERE THE BRAVE DWELL AT HEART!"

A few people jumped where they were walking past, and Remus dropped the textbook in his lap, "Shit!" 

James momentarily stopped talking, to look at Remus in something between shock and awe, "Your parents let you _swear!"_

"Wh-"

"Shit" Peter piped up, looking quite proud of himself. 

"Shit shit shit!" James joined in, eyes full of mirth, "Sweet vocabulary freedom!" 

Sirius looked around, smirking, if only Mother could see him now, "SHIT!" 

And the four of them set off towards Hogwarts, curse words and exasperated sighs advising people to give the carriage a wide birth, _God knows what trouble that lot will get into._


	3. Gryffindor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First look at the castle, sorting *sweats profusely*, and some Snivellus Snape.

"Merlin" James breathed, looking up from their boat. 

Hogwarts was _huge,_ It had massive towers- four to be exact -protruding from each corner of its square structure, sandy brown in colour, thousands of little windows appearing like fireflies in the night sky. What Sirius guessed to be _miles_ of forest surrounded them, they were truly in the middle of nowhere. A waving tentacle appeared in the corner of his eye, blue skin blending with the lake in perfect, evolutionary camouflage. 

"Look!" He pointed at the ripples it left behind. 

"I'm going to be sick" Remus groaned, keeping his eyes trained to the bottom of the boat, "Why is this thing rocking about so much!?" 

James stopped switching sides then, giving Remus a guilty smile. 

"Arright, of yer get!" Hagrid said, clambering out his own boat with one of the kids that fell in, they were already red and shivering.

"Poor kid" James grimaced, legs slightly wobbly from just getting back on solid ground. 

"Guys, everyone's going!" Peter pointed, egging them on. 

The inside of the castle was just as extravagant. Two daunting wooden doors let them in, revealing walls and walls of portrait littered stone, the carpeting was a deep red in the entrance, but soon cut off to wall-matching stone slabs. The collection of first years were bound to have a neck ache in the morning, most of them looking straight up at the ghosts that danced about the ceiling. 

"Whooohoooo, all my new ickle firsties!" Someone sang from behind their huddle, making them spin in all directions, which seemed to encourage the cackling, "Catch me if you caaaaaan!"

"Peeves" A woman silenced it with a stern look, she had lovely brown hair that was tied in a neat bun, green robes billowing around her, "I am Professor McGonnagall, Gryffindors head of house-" James perked up "-and your Transfiguration teacher. As you know, in order to settle into your respective houses, you must _be_ sorted, which is where I will lead you now. You do not need to worry, it is a painless and easy task, you will also be meeting Headmaster Dumbledore. It goes without saying that you must be silent and respectful whilst others are talking, no joking about until dinner commences, which I'm sure you are all very capable of. Please follow me." 

She opened another pair of oak doors with a flick of her wrist--which Sirius thought was very impressive--and led them into a chatter filled hall, which quieted down almost immediately. Four long tables full of students, all their eyes on the new comers. Professor McGonnagall stood by a small stool, mangy old hat in one hand, list in the other. 

Much to Sirius' shock, a mouth appeared in the wrinkles of it. 

"One thousand years ago this story starts.." It sung.

"There were four sorcerers with strong and kind hearts  
Bold Gryffindor from wild moor  
Fair Ravenclaw from glen  
Sweet Hufflepuff from valley broad  
Shrewd Slytherin from fen

They had a dream to teach all that they knew  
Witches and wizards came far and it grew  
'Til a castle stood tall by the shores of a lake   
And a thousand years later the magic remains

Old Hogwarts Sorting Hat sing me a song  
Speak in my head tell me where I belong  
And when things look bad and there's no where to run  
Unite all the houses and we'll fight as one

Brave Godric Gryffindor favoured the strong  
Those who had courage and knew right from wrong

And Rowena Ravenclaw taught only the best

So kind Helga Hufflepuff would teach all the rest

But Salazar Slytherin had is own plans  
He thought the Muggle-borns didn't understand

The subtleties of magic and so he devised  
The Chamber of Secrets with a monster inside

Old Hogwarts Sorting Hat sing me a song  
Speak in my head tell me where I belong  
And when things look bad and there's no where to run  
Unite all the houses and we'll fight as one

Old Hogwarts Sorting Hat sing me a song  
Speak in my head tell me where I belong  
And when things look bad and there's no where to run

Unite all the houses and we'll fight as one

Unite all the houses and we'll fight as one." 

Most of the older students started to clap, which implied they had to as well. Sirius stole a glance over at the green table, just to meet Bellatrix's malicious stare, she smirked in a way that chilled him to his very bone, it was almost _mad._

"Abbot, Arabella" Professor McGonnagall recited from her list. The short, blonde girl sat on the little stool, hat covering most of her anxious face. 

"HUFFLEPUFF" The hat shouted, setting off many claps and cheers from the house, everyone greeting her with smiles and hugs. 

"Avery, Carson" 

The hat took a lot less time, "SLYTHERIN" It announced after mere seconds. 

"Black, Sirius" 

Sirius' breath hitched in his throat as whispers went through the hall...

_"That's the heir"_

_"Slytherin through and through, that one"_

_"Kid's loaded"_

Sirius tuned out the rest of their comments as he sat on the stool. 

"Well, well" The hat pondered in his head, "Sirius Black, heir to the Black family fortune, a _Slytherin_ family fortune. Yes, hmmm, Slytherin would do you well boy, but not well enough...I think we'll go with-"

"-GRYFFINDOR" 

Everyone went dead silent. 

Sirius' eyes widened, he didn't know how to feel, but this was what he wanted. 

Wasn't it? 

"Oh dear, oh dear" He could hear a whisper from Slytherin, no doubt his cousin. 

"YEAH! WOOHOO, NICE ONE SIRIUS, SEE U IN A MINUTE MATE!" James shouted into the silence, effectively setting off the rest of Gryffindor house. 

"SUCK ON THAT MUCLIBER!" A redheaded boy shouted beside his twin, who was giving out some crude hand gestures, clapping Sirius on the back, both fiercely silenced by a Professor. 

Sirius sat down, robes magically switching to a deep red, expression still unmoving. He tuned out the rest of the sorting, he could practically hear his mother yelling from here, all up to when James jumped beside him.

"Pwoh, must be shocked bout that one, eh?" James asked him, Peter and Remus had gotten into Gryffindor as well. 

Sirius couldn't look up, he just knew a family member was waiting for him to meet their gaze, waiting to exaggerate the inevitable. James noticed this, gave him a friendly pat on the shoulder, and turned back to the sorting. 

"Snape, Severus" 

He heard a girl beside him inhale sharply, and looked up. The boys most defining feature was his nose, which didn't pair up well with his greasy hair, all around a bit of a state to Sirius. 

"SLYHTERIN" 

The girl beside him sighed, tucking some red hair behind her ear, green eyes filling with disappointed tears. 

"Er, are you alright?" James asked her, looking at Remus with apprehension, who just shrugged. 

"Fine" She snapped just as the food appeared, effectively distracting them both. 

Peter had already accumulated a feast in itself on his plate, digging in merrily while Remus just picked at some chicken. Sirius wasn't hungry at all, the end of this couldn't come quick enough, he just wanted to go sit in a dark room and wallow in self hatred, just how Mother would've liked.

"Mister Lupin?" Professor McGonnagall appeared behind them, near the end of the feast, briefly giving Sirius a comforting smile, "The Headmaster will see you now" 

"Blimey" James said around some trifle, "How're you in the shi- I mean- trouble already!?" 

"Mister Lupin is not in trouble, Mister Potter. Please go back to your desert" 

Remus got up and left, measly excuse of a dinner left half-eaten. Sirius pocketed some wrapped shortbread, just in case he was hungry later. 

**_____**

"Wonder what that was about?" James asked as they followed Delilah Simms and Adam Richardson--the Gryffindor prefects--out of the great hall later that evening.

"What was what about?" Peter asked, so full he ought to be waddling.

"Remus having to see _Dumbledore"_

"Mm, not sure" 

They stopped talking after that, just admiring the scenery around them, slightly wheezing up the countless steps to Gryffindor Tower. This gave Sirius some time to go over various life decisions. He didn't _ask_ to be put here, surely his parents can't be mad at him for something he had no control over, no doubt he will be getting enough bother from Bellatrix anyway. What was going to happen when he got home, was Regulus going to _hate_ him? Would Mother and Father hurt him for it? Would- 

"Your password is _leones hinnitum"_ Adam said, portrait swinging open to reveal a concrete lined gap in the wall, warmth radiating from it. Everyone flooded in, looking a round the red-washed common room, there were two gatherings of three sofa's around two fireplaces, various armchairs scattered around, homework tables and stools carved from wood. 

"Everyone up to your labelled dorms, girls in here, boys over there" Delilah directed them over to some staircases, "There will be plenty of time to spend in here over the next seven years, come on"

The three boys walked into the dorm labelled _First Years_ to be greeted with their trunks at the end of, what had been decided were, their respective beds. There were four, four-poster beds in the room, and a bathroom door off to one side. They had curtains surrounding them, which Sirius immediately took advantage of, hiding himself away in the darkness. 

He climbed to rest his back against the headboard, knees to his chest, head buried in his hands. _He was so screwed._

"Sirius..?" James asked tentatively, opening the curtains slightly, "Are you alright?" 

He stayed silent, hopefully James would go away if he didn't talk. 

"I'll take that as a no then" 

Sirius felt the bed dip next to him as James sat himself down, "You don't have to talk about it if you don't wanna" 

"I don't" Sirius groaned, dropping his hands. 

"You know," James started, "Being Gryffindor isn't as bad as your making out, we're the _fun_ house, the brave ones" He brandished an imaginary sword, pretending to throw it at an oblivious Peter across the room. 

Sirius tried his hardest to hold back an amused grin, he shouldn't be laughing, he should be feeling sorry for himself. 

"Not to my parents" He said after a beat, sighing. 

"You know what I say to that?" 

"What?" 

"Utter _Shit_ "

**______**

It must have been 10pm when Sirius sat up to the sound of a door closing, Peter and James long asleep after the days shenanigans, himself still too anxious to settle. He crawled forward and whipped his curtains open, holding up a wand he was still yet to learn how to use, but it was just Remus. 

"Were you with Dumbledore this entire time!?" He asked, startling the boy. 

"Fuck _me_ " He held a hand to his heart, turning around to face the now gaping Sirius, "You scared me" 

"Where do you _learn_ all those!" Sirius only ever heard Father swear, and that was when he was in his study thinking he was alone. 

"Uh...I guess my dad swears a lot when he drops something," 

"Does your Mother not tell him off!?"

Sirius saw how Remus' eyes glazed over for a second, and how he hurried over to his bed, "No" 

"Wait, did I upset you?" Sirius got up, surely nothing in that sentence was _offensive,_ he'd said it all- 

"No, my Mothers- she's uh _sick"_

_Oh,_ "I'm sorry" 

"S'alright, you didn't know" 

Sirius was starting to realise he didn't know a lot of things. Remus' stomach grumbled. 

"Oh!" That reminded him, he went over to his robes and dug around the pockets, pulling out a wrapped piece of shortbread. 

"In case you got hungry" 

"Thanks" Remus took the offering, eating it feverishly. 

"Blimey, needed that huh?" Sirius laughed, going back to his bed. 

"Yeah, goodnight" 

"Night" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GAH! I just want these younger years to be over so I can write WOLFSTAR!!!!!!
> 
> Anyways, comment some cute headcannons I can add in :P


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